12 More Reasons You Should Hate MMA, Too

rogan2by A O’Toole

In summary, you should hate MMA because of the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC). So the list goes:

  1. Joe Rogan.  He just has no good criticisms.  Who would have anything worth saying with a mouth full of meat and bung-hole?
  2. BS Scoring.  I’ve been in a bunch of brawls and one on ones, and if a guy was leaning on someone’s hip against a fence it didn’t mean he was winning.  Cage control and ground control is moot when nobody’s submitting and nobody is getting pummeled.
  3. Bruce Buffer.  What a hack, underachieving half-brother desperately chasing the shadow of Micheal Buffer, a real announcer.  The snapping, exaggerated, trying too hard, circus introductions are so apropos for this WWE showcase.
  4. The best fighter in the world is in Strikeforce.  Fedor is the boss.
  5. The limiting rules.  It used to be the limited rules, but that’s when the UFC was realistic.
  6. The lies. The UFC is a hype machine fooling millions of people that these guys are really elite.  It’s not refined enough yet, so there are plenty of bums among the good guys.  The UFC promotes for idiot fans and a lot of punks.  The cheap heavy metal music is proof enough.   The mediocre is sold as spectacular.  Roy Jones wouldn’t have been fooled that Forrest Griffin was a main event fighter.  Even most of the bums Roy fought had proven records, not 16-6.
  7. Dana White.  What a jerk.  He is like a Nazi.  He cares nothing about the growth of mma.  He matches up guys against their best interest and he makes judgments to ban people for mishaps that are irrelevant to fighting.  That’s business, but it doesn’t actually help the sport.  His tyranny allows him to criticize Anderson Silva for not being exciting – Silva’s job, as a legitimate sportsman, is to win and that is it.  He’ll whine and pout like a spoiled, bratty college kid who didn’t get to max-out mommy’s credit card.  And fighters have to prove themselves to him?  Check the TUF series in which he asks for fighters to sacrifice their dignity and to “beg the best” for a shot.  White needs checks and balances to offset his idiocy.  Fighters need personal representation and not to sign their potential careers away to a circus act that is the UFC.
  8. Joe Rogan. Did I mention that he is a cheerleading groupie who sucks-off all the fighters?
  9. The Ultimate Fighter (TUF).  What a bunch of coddled, upper-middle class hicks who think they’re tough because their high schools each had 500 or so kids who they were tougher than.  Anyone could try out for TUF, get lucky, and show up on the UFC.  Where is the humility that is born from really being a fighter and knowing that there is always someone tougher than you are?
  10. Football-like paint on the face hyped ring walks.  Any fighter knows to stay calmer than these psyched up morons.  You don’t have to psyche yourself up, you’re in a fight.
  11. There is only one Anderson Silva. It’s not his fault crap competition is making him think he could box Roy Jones.
  12. Soft chins. Wow, I don’t want to hear the small glove argument.  When you have guys getting knocked out with jabs, a la Kimbo Slice, you know there is a huge problem with the weeding out of chumps in mma.  When a boxer realizes his chin is as weak as some mma guys, he doesn’t even turn amateur.

* The ideas expressed in submitted articles are not necessarily the views of ShootaFairOne.com

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16 responses to “12 More Reasons You Should Hate MMA, Too

  1. You sound so tough.

  2. chapmanikov@hotmail.co.uk

    Your boxing analysis is second to none. Your opinion of MMA is based on a skewed and childish view and is quite frankly, pathetic.

  3. O’Toole
    I once had a friend named Bruce. That fucker couldnt hold down his Haggis and Loch Lomond. Fought like a lassie and probably took it in the ARS! In other words there is only one Michael Buffer. SCOTLAND!!!!!!

  4. MMA is the greatest sport on earth. This is just a jesting article. Men wrestle because its the nature not punching, but don’t you think Chuck Liddell has some of the best stand up you have ever seen?

  5. haha. Joe Blowgan, Blow-again, Blow-man. He’s a true ass-sniffing boot licking annoyance.

  6. People who follow TUF are fight fans, but not necessarily martial artists. The thug attitude and the destruction of house property is immature, unprofessional behavior that sets a bad example for kids. When you have real skills, you don’t have to act like an asshole to try to intimidate future opponents. If these guys were for real, they would respect the other fighters and train as if it were a job. There shouldn’t be guys with unproven records, deficiencies in certain ranges, and questionable willingness to fight. This certainly means that some of the guys do belong to be there, but get rid of the ADHD punks who train MMA to stomp and bully people because they don’t want to be chicken pluckers for the rest of their lives. How about getting guys in there that deserve a shot; not tattooed muscle heads who have blue belts in BJJ but like to fight. Also, rarely do these guys show any stand-up skills, and yet they always talk about knocking out their opponent. Fighters should have some kind of criteria before getting on the show; maybe a brown belt in BJJ, a winning amateur record with at least 8 fights, a psych eval to weed out the knuckleheads (although Dana White probably wants them on for entertainment purposes), and a limit of three tattoos (tattoos are so played-out already and ubiquitous). Here’s an idea: instead of the fighters fighting each other, they have to fight the opposing coach. If they don’t get knocked out or submitted in the first round (maybe a three minute round), they stay to do the show and fight for the TUF championship.

  7. Agreed! F**k MMA

  8. One thing I dislike more that UFC is the blind devoted followers that doesn’t question what is before him. MMA is a great concept, but the UFC does the sport a disservice by the circus like atmosphere and antics. As much as I like the fighting sports, I feel that the overall level of competition in MMA is amateur at best. There are a few truly elite fighters; however there many given the honor of “Hall of Fame” material after a short (and in my opinion) unspectacular career. Boxers go through years and years of training to move up the ranks to become an experienced veteran. There is never a case where a self-proclaimed boxer would get a title shot 3 fights into his career and win the belt. MMA is great in its own right, but it needs to be fixed, a lot. Yes, boxing does have its flaws, but at least the fights are truthful about a fighter’s skill.

  9. Bruce Buffer is Gay

    Great read. Bruce Buffer is the annoying brother who will forever be in Michael’s shadow. i don’t care about his life story. His voice is so annoying. wtf is “it’s time!”?

  10. Holy Shit!!!! I agree with JJ. These guys seem like MMA cult members aka 17 yr. old jerk offs from some hick farm that just discovered pay per view. LOL. Anyway, I agree with all of the 12, except for number 8…….Just kidding. You know you just scrolled up to read #8. Keep up the shit O’ Toole

  11. This stuff is funny as hell. You guys take it too personal but do you see the truth in it? Bruce Buffer seems like the underachieving bro. He IS corny!lol. Great site. Joe Rogan is scared to ask questions we wanna hear.

  12. im truly enraged. i don’t know u but i would take you down and out and show u what mma is all about. o’toole is truly a tool!

    • Internet gangster don’t even know the writer probly. It makes mma look worse, guys like you. your prob a weightlifting faggot that lifts weights just to look cool. and you prob will take the guy out. To dinner.

  13. A O’Toole….. you’re a tool.

  14. attentionseekers

    keep writing your oh so thought provoking blogs. you’re like a kid who loves the sound of his own voice, no matter if what he says is complete nonsense based on no proof. there are ELEMENTS of truth in what you say but mainly it seems you’re just trying to stir up some attention. – i will just break down one of your points for sake of time. Bruce Buffer is not in anyone’s shadow. He has managed his brother’s career for a long time and is very proud of his brother but Bruce has forged his own way. Michael actually has Bruce to thank for where he is and Bruce is very famous in his own right. He owns successful businesses outside of his UFC gig not to mention a radio show.

  15. You are a punk

    This sounds like a little girl having a hissy fit

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